This piece wasn’t created to be shared. It was created as part of my Level 1 Soul Art certification - an assignment, a process, a conversation with myself on canvas.
At the time, I didn’t fully understand what I was looking for. I just knew I needed clarity.
Clarity about my voice.
Clarity about my work.
Clarity about who I am here for.
Listening to the Body Instead of the Mind
Before this, I had spent years trying to figure it out in my head. Marketing background. Messaging exercises. Ideal client avatars. All useful, but none of it touched the truth.
This process was different.
Instead of thinking my way to an answer, I traced my body. I layered color. I wrote directly onto the canvas. I placed images, symbols, and faces where they felt right - not where they made sense. And slowly, something began to emerge.
Not an idea.
A knowing.
What Revealed Itself
As I worked, I noticed who I was drawn to include. The faces. The emotions. The stories underneath the surface. There was a thread running through all of it - something I recognized not just visually, but viscerally.
These were not just “women.”
These were women who have experienced violation.
Women who have been silenced.
Women who have learned to leave their bodies in order to survive.
Women like me.
That realization didn’t come all at once. It came in layers. Just like the painting. But once I saw it, I couldn’t unsee it.
The Moment of Clarity
There was a moment - quiet, but undeniable - where it clicked:
This is who I am here to serve.
Not everyone.
Not broadly “women interested in creativity.”
But specifically…
Women who are sexual trauma survivors.
Women who are finding their way back into their bodies.
Women who are ready, in their own time, to reclaim their voice, their power, and their creativity.
Why This Matters
Naming this changed everything. It brought focus to my writing, depth to my art, and honesty to my message. It also brought responsibility.
Because this is sacred work.
It requires care.
It requires respect for pace.
It requires a deep understanding that healing is not linear - and never forced.
This is not about fixing anyone. It’s about creating space where a woman can begin to remember who she was before she learned to disappear.
Art as a Way Back
This bodymap didn’t just give me clarity about my audience. It reminded me how I want to serve.
Through creativity.
Through expression.
Through the body, not just the mind.
Because for many survivors, healing doesn’t start with words.
It starts with color.
With movement.
With feeling something again, even if it’s small.
If This Is You
If something in you feels this…
If you’ve ever left your body to survive…
If you’ve ever felt disconnected from your voice…
If you’ve ever wondered if there’s a way back…
There is.
And you don’t have to rush it. You don’t have to force it. You don’t even have to have the words for it yet.
You just have to begin.
Create boldly.
Live beautifully.
At your own pace.
If something in you feels this… you’re not alone.
I share reflections like this, along with creative practices and quiet encouragement for the journey, in my monthly newsletter, What’s Blooming in the Orchid Garden.
You’re welcome to join us.
When you subscribe, you’ll also receive my free ebook: “Create Boldly. Live Beautifully: A Gentle Guide to Reclaiming Your Voice.”
Wander a little further through the garden...